A mid-90’s Ben Stiller “flop,” or a Jim Carrey cult-classic? How about a prophetic warning of the cultural nightmare we’re navigating right now? Everything has happened before—and everything will happen again, after all. I really liked this movie, and was thoroughly creeped out by Carry’s performance as the stalker-esq, overbearing Cable Guy that Matthew Broderick can’t shake due to 1. a mis-read attempt at getting free cable and 2. his spineless inability to hurt anyone’s feelings. But there was a moral to the story too, although at the time it was about being addicted to television. Now, with everyone facing a moral dilemma about Facebook stealing their Personally Identifiable Information (PII), selling it and using it for evil (instead of good), I can’t help but say, “hey…they warned us.”
He’s desperate for attention
Remember when Facebook was young and brands were practically begging you to like their pages? And your grandma wanted you to like her posts? Wait…maybe it’s still a little bit like that. And, even now, with all the public Instagram accounts going “private,” warning people to follow now before it’s too late feels a little forced. In The Cable Guy, Chip Douglas (Carry) is desperate to win approval from his new client. He plays it cool at first, but the moment Steven (Broderick) pushes back, he visibly panics. Then, he lashes out.
He knows all about you
Facebook now has more than enough data to make it feel like they’re reading your mind or listening to your conversations. So much, in fact, they do not need to listen to your conversations. Read that again…they don’t need to listen to your conversations because they’re smart enough to predict your next move. In the movie, Chip knows enough about his target to predict where to find him, where his friends are, and (truly creepy) what status his relationships are in. Does that sound at all familiar to you?
He stalks your friends
Ever feel left out of the fun? Facebook knows who’s going to that party this weekend and the average probability that your invitation wasn’t lost in the shuffle. Facebook can track whether or not your spouse is crushing on someone from their past, who’s looking at who’s pics, and they can do whatever they want with this info. In The Cable Guy, Chip gets insanely jealous of Steven’s long-time friend (Jack Black) and starts sabotaging the relationship. This brings us to…
He manipulates your relationships
Have you felt a subtle tinge of jealously in the last few years due to social media? Did you know that Facebook used you as a science experiment in 2014? Look, when you don’t pay for a service, you become the product. That’s the rule. Doesn’t make it ethical. Or legal. But, it’s true. Steven didn’t pay for cable and Chip manipulated his relationships for personal gain. There’s a horribly uncomfortable scene in the movie where Chip shows up at a dinner party with Steven’s family and his rocky-relationship-status girlfriend. This scene is a nightmare; the audience knows that Jim Carrey is a true sociopath who’s fooled everyone in the room to think he’s a great guy. We’re in the protagonist’s seat (with Broderick) watching everything unfold, powerless to gain control of our (his) life. Look at what happened a few years ago: Facebook left it’s users feeling “disturbed” in 2016 with only negative posts and status updates. What kind of side effect did that have? Did anyone go through a really tough 2016? Anyone?
He’s not real.
Does it ever feel like everyone you see on Facebook is having a better time than you? Have you heard the term “Fakebook” tossed around? That’s because Facebook thrives off of advertising dollars. Now, I don’t want to go all Tyler-Durden on us, but the cargo-culture of “look how happy our marriage is” posts, followed by the “can’t get enough of my zen lifestyle” tags can sometimes feel like a life-style arms race. In the movie, our villain goes out of his way to portray a false lifestyle built from a collective narrative that isn’t real. It’s based n what he’s seen in Heineken commercials. It’s painfully sad and blatantly obvious to the audience. But, in real life? It’s getting harder to tell who’s being serious and who’s joking when they tag sponsors in their posts and they’re not even sponsored.
He’s really hard to get rid of.
Matthew Broderick can’t seem to shake Jim Carrey in The Cable Guy. Once he’s in his life, that’s it. After all, you wouldn’t want to be without cable…would you? What would happen if you didn’t have the nice warm glow of your television to console you at the end of the day? OK, OK, the message was supposed to be a joke. The movie was a comedy. No one is that evil, and Carrey’s character was just, just…silly. But…? But, people are having a hard time getting rid of Facebook! It turns out it is hard to get rid of it! Our businesses are tied to it. Our families are there!
I had a friend who was kind of like Facebook. He’d been my friend, my good friend, for almost twenty years. He said I was one of his only close friends, in fact. He knew so much about me: my friends, what music I liked, who I was dating (had dated, etc), what kind of guys I liked.
But when it came down to it, he was just an operator. He wasn’t a friend. He didn’t stick up for me, and he simply spectated when people talked shit about me. When I called him out on this, he said it wasn’t his place to get in the middle of people’s conflicts. He said this while he was in the middle of everything. He knew our mutual friends didn’t really like me, and he even told me as much. (So much for remaining neutral…) He jumped in and took advantage of me when I was down-trodden and he swooped in and dated someone behind my back.
So what did I do? I cut him off. I quit. I opted out. Yeah, it kinda hurt. I miss him. But, I’m better off now.
You kind of feel bad for him.
At the end of The Cable Guy, you get a glimpse of poor Chip’s upbringing. How the monster was created. How the sociopathic response to his environment gestated out of pure loneliness. I had a similar response when I saw the creator of Facebook appear before his senate hearing. Was he a weird lonely kid who wanted to look inside of everyone’s hidden life to discover why they had friends when he didn’t? Did he secretly want to know who people liked, and why?
In the end, the characters in the movie find themselves without cable. It’s comical, but they turn to books to and rediscover stories like newly enlightened (see: woke) people. Maybe that’s where we’re headed. Or, maybe something bigger, badder and more powerful will fill its place?
Bechdel test (Pass/Fail): Fail
